mystisblom | an articel about the oc god i love this show and fran is total into it too and havent seen it yet gg

Will & Grace. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Boy Meets Boy. Gay bishops. Legal sodomy. The confluence of all these events has finally created something all us queens have wanted since we first laid eyes on Brandon in 90210. It's called The O.C., and the homoerotic subtext in the pilot is thicker than you'd find at a Catholic boys' camp. Why honey, this is the gayest thing I've seen since... well, since Pearl Harbor.
The set-up is a little bit of a stretch -- cute blondie Ryan (Benjamin McKenzie, TV debutante) gets arrested after his brother steals a car and tries to do the high-speed pursuit thing. Ryan meets his public defender, Sandy Cohen (Peter Gallagher, American Beauty), then gets thrown out by his mother and step-father. Ryan calls Sandy, who decides to bring the boy home to stay for the weekend (!) -- just until children's services opens on Monday. (Right, like they ever close.) Or does forty-something Sandy make it a habit of dragging home underage, homeless pretty-boys? His wife's reaction isn't exactly friendly at first, and she banishes Ryan to the pool house -- which conveniently has no curtains. I think perhaps she's seen this scenario before, dreading how much it's going to cost her after. Oh yeah -- they make it clear that the wife is the one with all the money. Public Defenders don't exactly earn enough to be able to fart in Armani.

So far, so subtle, but the next morning, Ryan walks into the house and meets Sandy's son, Seth (Adam Brody, upcoming The Grind), who's about his age. After an exchange of "Heys," Seth says the line that almost knocked me off my chair. "Wanna play?" Cue porno music, take it away boys and I want plenty of grunting and moaning. Okay, so Seth was holding his joystick at the time. No, I mean an actual game-controller, and the next shot (pun intended) has them sitting on the floor playing video games. Sigh. Seth wins, but as he makes the big score in the game, his reaction is a tad on the, shall we say, orgasmic side? If anyone were to see that shot in isolation, I'd defy them to not assume that Seth is blasting a nice big load all over the ceiling. Talk about putting the big O in O.C....

In the next scene, the boys are sailing together in the Pacific, as Seth tells of his plan for next summer -- sailing the boat all the way to Tahiti, with girl-next-door Summer (newcomer Rachel Bilson) along for the ride. Except, of course, Summer doesn't know Seth exists. Then, we have one of those "surrogate father ties necktie and bonds" scenes, in which Sandy does it facing Ryan. Uh, ties the tie, that is. The two of them are standing way too close. While Sandy is tying the tie, Ryan stares at his face for far too long, and I found myself wondering, "Hm. Could he be into older men?" Cue My Heart Belongs to Daddy...

There are little touches all over the place that give the ga(y)me away. The family and Ryan go to a fashion show benefit, at which Luke (Chris Carmack), a "rich, hence evil" boy, bumps into Seth and mutters "queer" under a cough. Later, a younger boy stares at Seth for far too long, looking for all the world like he has a schoolboy crush on him. (The older-man lust thing is all over the place here.) The camera discovers Ryan in the crowd and goes close on his face just as the background song lyrics are, "'Cause you're so young and pretty."

And honey, is he ever. He's the kind of boy any man would want to take home for the weekend, regardless of sexual preference. Any woman, too, even the lesbians -- and that's what makes this series work. Although it's his first film or TV credit, twenty-six year-old (hallelujah!) McKenzie does an excellent job as a caring teen who keeps everything close to the vest. He cares a lot about everyone around him, particularly shy Seth, but tries not to let it show. McKenzie is a canny enough actor that we can see completely through what he's hiding even as he succeeds in hiding it from his onscreen compatriots. Whether or not The O.C. takes off and becomes a hit, I predict long-term success for this blond hunk. Incidentally, there are not only looks but brains in this family -- Benjamin McKenzie's uncle is Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Robert Schenkkan, of Kentucky Cycle fame.

But, back to the subliminal gay porn that is The O.C..

After Seth sees Ryan talking to Summer, the two boys have a nasty lover's quarrel. Er... straight-boy fight. Okay, on the surface they're pretending Seth is jealous over Summer -- but the scene plays out like Seth has his little panties in a wad because the boy he's lusting after is chatting up some stupid fish. Not long after, Seth gets picked on by Luke and friends, and Ryan rushes to his defense -- which struck me as odd, seeing as how Seth has just called him scum and revealed to the partygoers that this mysterious stranger is not from glamorous Boston nor trendy Seattle, but a resident of (YUCK!) Chino. Ryan winds up getting smacked around. Cut to the pool house, where Ryan and Seth have a sentimental "thanks for saving my ass" conversation. Then, Seth goes to sleep on the couch. Intercut between Seth's sleeping face and Ryan staring at him as romantic music swells. Jesus, Joseph and Sister Mary Elephant, it wouldn't have been more obvious if Seth had sat on Ryan's face. I suspect, though, that by mid-season, he will.

Ryan finds Summer, drunk and passed out in front of her house, and brings her back to the poolhouse. He puts Summer in the bed, then lies on the futon. The top of the next act begins with a shot of Seth asleep, Ryan visible behind him on the futon, girlie nowhere in sight because she has, in fact, already left. Although they're effectively in the ol' 1950s double beds, I think the producers subtly use that to imply some sexual connection here. After all, the two boys wake up together and the girl is gone -- indicating that she's a phantom attraction, a red-herring to make acceptable the closeness of these two budding young men.

And if you don't think they're close, check out the reaction after Mom banishes Ryan, blaming him for the fight Seth was in the night before. The boys' farewell is way too emotional for two straight teen-dudez who've just met -- unless they've already pumped each other's pistons. Several times. They hug, Seth promises to visit in Chino, then gives Ryan a map of Tahiti. Hm. I wonder who Seth really wants in that boat with him for a long, hot, private summer...? They did all but French kiss each other good-bye, and I was expecting Seth to be down on his knees at any second, defying the great gay porno dictum: "Blond is always the bottom." (The other great gay porno dictum being "First one on his knees gets plowed.")

Ryan's drive-away shot cranks the emotion way up. He looks back at the house, very regretful. Sad music plays. He's getting way-too busted up about this unless he's been getting some, and it sure hasn't been with Summer, Mom or the maid. And then, the really big give-away: Sandy just can't bring himself to leave Ryan in Chino. Of course not -- he hasn't gotten any of that fine blond booty yet. Ryan returns to Newport Beach, ensuring that this pilot will have a second episode.

And just in case we didn't get it, the promo for next week shows Ryan and Summer and Seth doing one of those walks on the beach things, followed by a scene in which Ryan seems to be running away and Seth tearfully tells him, "I'm coming with you."

Take that line as you will. If you've been paying any attention online, you'll know that bisexuality has taken off like wildfire in Generation Y. Maybe that should be Generation K-Y. But, boys doing it with girls and with boys has just lost the stigma of former years. It's all good, and it wouldn't be unusual for Fox to push the envelope yet again. They already had ample underage drinking and teen smoking and drug use in the pilot. Why wouldn't they take it a step further and give us the first, if not outright gay, at least bisexual teen drama hero? It would be a crossover hit with a huge gay following. Because I have nothing against a guy who swings both ways, as long as one of those ways is mine.